You know that moment when you first wake up, the room is dark, and you’re in that no-man’s-land, unsure if you’ve slept enough or should roll over and grab another hour? That’s me, every single morning.
But here’s the thing: my Oura ring has completely changed those mornings. Sure, it makes me reach for my phone first thing (not ideal, I know), but with Sleep Focus on my iPhone, social media stays asleep, and no texts or calls get through my electronic boundaries. It’s just me and the Oura app.
In the stillness, I open the app, wait five seconds for my ring to sync, and voilà—there’s my sleep data. In under two minutes, I know whether to pop out of bed, grab my coffee, and head to my office loveseat for my morning routine—or roll over for another hour, guilt-free, knowing the difference it’ll make in my sleep and readiness scores.
Even when my sleep data isn’t great, Oura softens the blow. Their messages are kind and reassuring: It’s okay. Try to take it easy today if you can. It’s the kind of self-talk we all hope to give ourselves. And honestly? It works.
Before my Oura ring, my mornings started with assumptions—mostly negative ones. I’d convince myself my sleep was terrible, and that attitude set the tone for the day. Now, I have facts. That little nudge to start the day with kindness—toward myself—makes all the difference.
Mornings: My Recharge Time
There’s a magic to mornings that I love. It’s just me, sitting in my upstairs office next to a big window overlooking the chicken coop. (Though, let’s be real—it’s December in Alaska, so I can’t see the coop until 10 a.m.) Solstice is coming, but for now, it’s cozy throws, warm coffee, and the glow of my trusty plant light. That light gets my office plants through the darkest time of year, and honestly, it gets me through, too.
But as with all things, what was once new and exciting—like checking the Oura app throughout the day—has become more familiar. Now, I check in twice: morning and evening. I’ve noticed patterns—like how water impacts my heart rate variability (it’s wild how much of a difference staying hydrated makes), my daily steps (around 9,250 these days), and my nemesis: resilience.
The Side Quest of Resilience
I came across the concept of a side quest in one of my many nonfiction reads, and it stuck. A side quest is something small, fun, and low-stakes—a tiny challenge that makes you smile.
I have two:
Grabbing exactly 12 pounds of hay from our 50-pound bales to feed the horses each morning.
Improving my Oura resilience score.
Resilience tracks how well I handle life’s curveballs, and let me tell you—it’s been low since September. Between challenges at my bookstore (now resolved), big changes in my candle business (fantastic but intense), and the holiday whirlwind, it’s been a season.
Every morning, I check my sleep first and then, with bated breath, open the resilience tab. Today, I saw a tiny bump—almost out of “adequate” and into “solid.” I’ve never hit “excellent,” but the day I do? Watch out—I’ll be firing up my Substack editor and writing to you about that moment! For now, though, I’m patting myself on the back for climbing back toward solid.
Why Tiny Wins Matter
For the longest time, I only celebrated the big wins. I thought progress was all about keeping my head down, working hard, and pushing through exhaustion. But somewhere along the way, I realized how powerful it is to make a big deal out of the tiniest steps forward.
Side quests changed my perspective. They gave me the freedom to break my goals into laughably small milestones. Ones I’d never mention out loud because, let’s face it, people might give me the side-eye.
Privately, though, when I manage to grab exactly 12 pounds of hay on the first try, I hear my inner voice say, “Nice one.” It makes me smile. And behind the scenes, my brain gets a little hit of dopamine—a spark that builds momentum and makes the rest of the day brighter.
When my resilience ticks up, that same voice says, “Way to go,” just like my dad used to. On days when things go the other way—resilience down, 8 pounds instead of 12—I remind myself: tomorrow’s a new chance. Life is bumpy. We’re messy humans. But those tiny wins? They give me the oomph to keep going, even on the tough days.
Your Turn: Pick a Side Quest
What’s your infinitesimally small goal? It doesn’t have to be big or important. Maybe it’s brewing the perfect cup of coffee or taking that walk after dinner like we know we should but never take the time. Whatever it is, let yourself pause and celebrate it.
You don’t have to tell anyone or make it a big deal. Just smile to yourself. That little hit of joy? It’s yours, and it matters.
Share your side quest in our Everyday Wonders chat room. I’d love to cheer you on.
Here’s to noticing the small wonders we often overlook and giving them the attention they deserve,
Melissa